12-12-2012, 07:30 AM
I think it's a great first attempt. The vocabulary is good and imagery too and the whole idea about the murder and the juxtaposition of them.
I have something like "the darkness of his ominous energy overshadowed her"...or actually you could do so much with this, I almost wish I had written it
Ok, I'll leave it to you lol. Thanks for sharing it.
Anyway, I think his words ought to be in "..." to denote direct speech.
I have something like "the darkness of his ominous energy overshadowed her"...or actually you could do so much with this, I almost wish I had written it
Ok, I'll leave it to you lol. Thanks for sharing it.Anyway, I think his words ought to be in "..." to denote direct speech.