06-09-2013, 04:06 PM
I pray the sweetness of hope
instead of love.
this line above is great
Do not – for the best of you – indulge in that
pool of pain made so to break you
once you lost this sweet feeling.
again good
You better do not
corrupt the stones that hold you,
but should you feel so inclined,
to cut it short; do, please, not
waste away of what you don't have yet,
"you better do not" doesnt sound right to me. "You better not" or "do not" sounds better for a flow.
In altered zones of half-delight
I tumble around and the days
steal themselves away.
The lovers come and go,
leaving me lonely and
politics is not soothing me either,
I talk America, I talk to a beautiful nation.
Beautiful is not you my friend,
but the concept that governs you, is.
Just dare to read Jefferson.
thats all I got, it reads good except what I pointed out. But what do I know, I post in Novice.
instead of love.
this line above is great
Do not – for the best of you – indulge in that
pool of pain made so to break you
once you lost this sweet feeling.
again good
You better do not
corrupt the stones that hold you,
but should you feel so inclined,
to cut it short; do, please, not
waste away of what you don't have yet,
"you better do not" doesnt sound right to me. "You better not" or "do not" sounds better for a flow.
In altered zones of half-delight
I tumble around and the days
steal themselves away.
The lovers come and go,
leaving me lonely and
politics is not soothing me either,
I talk America, I talk to a beautiful nation.
Beautiful is not you my friend,
but the concept that governs you, is.
Just dare to read Jefferson.
thats all I got, it reads good except what I pointed out. But what do I know, I post in Novice.