01-03-2010, 08:27 AM
Yeah, so this is the first time I've released a poem to the public. So, give me some constructive criticism. I'm not a poet, by any means - I'm certainly not looking to quit my day-job.
"The Point Man"
I've been ahead of my squad
For so many years.
While others applaud,
I was the first to shed tears.
While others were awed,
I was the first to shed fears.
Despite rampant fraud,
I protected my peers.
With bright shiny eyes
And love in my chest
I often surmise.
I seldom invest.
Despite my heart's cries
My brain will attest
When true love applies,
It is love I professed.
I was the first to be married;
The first for divorce.
It was my friends that I carried -
It was my duty, of course.
It was my hatred I buried,
It is love I enforce.
It was selfishness I wearied,
With zero remorse.
On point, in the front -
It sets me apart.
I bear the most brunt.
I learn to outsmart.
I often confront
With all of my heart.
I occasionally grunt
When life becomes tart.
When love gives goodbyes
I'll be at my best.
When happiness dies,
I'll feel unstressed.
When life bring reprise,
I won't feel oppressed.
It's the plans you devise
Which gives me unrest.
So let's go to war
With jolly and glee.
What the hell for?
Beats the hell out of me.
You want to explore
How hard life can be?
To me you implore
To give you that key?
Hardship brings strength -
Which you do not deserve.
To any length
So strength I'll reserve.
Stay worthless and weak.
Stay hopeless and bleak.
You keep your technique,
You magnificent freak.
"The Point Man"
I've been ahead of my squad
For so many years.
While others applaud,
I was the first to shed tears.
While others were awed,
I was the first to shed fears.
Despite rampant fraud,
I protected my peers.
With bright shiny eyes
And love in my chest
I often surmise.
I seldom invest.
Despite my heart's cries
My brain will attest
When true love applies,
It is love I professed.
I was the first to be married;
The first for divorce.
It was my friends that I carried -
It was my duty, of course.
It was my hatred I buried,
It is love I enforce.
It was selfishness I wearied,
With zero remorse.
On point, in the front -
It sets me apart.
I bear the most brunt.
I learn to outsmart.
I often confront
With all of my heart.
I occasionally grunt
When life becomes tart.
When love gives goodbyes
I'll be at my best.
When happiness dies,
I'll feel unstressed.
When life bring reprise,
I won't feel oppressed.
It's the plans you devise
Which gives me unrest.
So let's go to war
With jolly and glee.
What the hell for?
Beats the hell out of me.
You want to explore
How hard life can be?
To me you implore
To give you that key?
Hardship brings strength -
Which you do not deserve.
To any length
So strength I'll reserve.
Stay worthless and weak.
Stay hopeless and bleak.
You keep your technique,
You magnificent freak.