Fruit

[71degrees]

Fruit

A man picking fruit bent over the land
turned as I passed,
smiling and waving his hand.
That night he committed suicide.

The next morning
I ate a bowl of fruit
and went to work
in a tie and a suit.

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I just realized I meant to post this in Mild Critique. Any way to change locations? D:

Try it in present tense. That might clear up any confusion. Drop "bent over the land"…it doesn't add much. Just my three cents. I like brevity. The more bare bones you make this, the more zip it has. Also, try to make the second stanza two complete sentence/thoughts. That would match better with the first stanza. Even the short ones need consistency.

I like this. Mad Men-ish with a touch of Grapes of Wrath.