Fruit

Fruit

Arachnid_Poet Offline

newbie

Posts: 13
Threads: 2
Joined: Jan 2014

#10

02-06-2014, 04:16 PM

what about in the first line, something like "man picks the fruit/and it bends the land?" oh wait that may not flow well. But at least experiment? Or what about "fruit picks the man/that bends the land/ turning as I pass a smile and waving his hand/tonight his fate is sealed with stars but not with light?" Just my two cents.

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Messages In This Thread

Fruit - by Humbert - 02-04-2014, 12:17 PM

RE: Fruit - by ChristopherSea - 02-04-2014, 10:24 PM

RE: Fruit - by Erthona - 02-05-2014, 12:11 AM

RE: Fruit - by Humbert - 02-05-2014, 01:34 PM

RE: Fruit - by bena - 02-05-2014, 05:38 AM

RE: Fruit - by ellajam - 02-05-2014, 09:12 PM

RE: Fruit - by Humbert - 02-06-2014, 10:57 AM

RE: Fruit - by tectak - 02-06-2014, 05:12 AM

RE: Fruit - by 71degrees - 02-06-2014, 01:32 PM

RE: Fruit - by Arachnid_Poet - 02-06-2014, 04:16 PM

RE: Fruit - by tomoffing - 02-07-2014, 07:58 AM

RE: Fruit - by Humbert - 02-07-2014, 08:30 AM

RE: Fruit - by Erthona - 02-07-2014, 08:37 AM

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