05-08-2014, 01:39 AM
Stumble and stroll don't match up. If the tree is alive on top dead below it doesn't match withering.
withering sidewalk elm,
decimated by Asian beetle
A native species dies
The first three stanza are describing the subjects environment and their perception of it. The 4th deviates into something more conceptual. I think it would be stronger if you found a way to make the close more rooted in the physical.
withering sidewalk elm,
decimated by Asian beetle
A native species dies
The first three stanza are describing the subjects environment and their perception of it. The 4th deviates into something more conceptual. I think it would be stronger if you found a way to make the close more rooted in the physical.