My first poem, feedback much appreciated

[bena]

It's obvious you are young and I remember writing angsty love stuff just like this. BUT in saying that, it is obvious that you have a good command of vocabulary, imagery and tempo. On that note I will say that you have great promise. My best advice I can give you as a veteran poet is to read, read, read...read all the great poets you have heard about in class. There is a reason they have been mentioned. You don't need to emulate them; but you can learn so much from them.

bena