09-03-2014, 06:00 PM
Hi. Nice composition
" Dark clouds hang around, lonely."
Perhaps,
Lonely dark clouds hand around,
" A choppy surface meets vague
and distant forms of land."
The line break here is little odd.
Consider this
A choppy surface
meets vague and distant form of land
" Dark clouds hang around, lonely."
Perhaps,
Lonely dark clouds hand around,
" A choppy surface meets vague
and distant forms of land."
The line break here is little odd.
Consider this
A choppy surface
meets vague and distant form of land