Compensations

[billy]

hi rowens, i think you trim just a few words off the poem while still keeping the narrative intact. [i think] in the first line weakens it. the third line could be shortened but i like it as a comparison to the 2nd line. normally i don't care for repetition but in this poem it works, i see a sense of naivety (no i don't why that is) it has a tim burton type of feel to it.

                                         Compensations


I think it's nice how the wind is blowing,
like something out of a movie,
almost like something out of a book.

Something old
and real—from being real a long time,
like grandparents' ghosts and ouija boards before Parker Brothers bought it. should it be Ouija

The wind at night, especially on an especially dark night, i like the language here, it feels wondrous, as though said by a child.
is like dead people alive: while it sounds good what does it mean; zombies?
I don't know why that is;

if I had to think about it
it probably wouldn't feel that way anymore.
But, then again, if I think about it I might feel it even more. this stanza feels a bit redundant.

I was only thirteen years old the first time I saw someone die,
and I don't remember anything about the weather or anything. would it add something extra without the [I]?
But I saw a movie where the wind blew,

and the dead returned at night.
And even though it was a horror movie,
I felt more reassured than scared.