01-25-2015, 11:00 AM
No, you are completely correct. This is not a very good poem, nor did I intend it as such. I spent less than five minutes on this and in terms of the finer points of poetics it shows. As I said in response to AJ's comments,
"Thanks AJ. Yes, this was never meant to be much of a poem, mainly just a way to inform about the story. It was a write once and post sort of thing..."
I took for granted you had read the other comments, the error is mine, as this shows, since I had already conceded this was in fact not a good poem, my assumption was your comments were in regard to something other than the critique itself. My bad. I agree the poem lacks any substantial depth, or any depth at all. I also agree with your general thesis, "The subject doesn't save a bad poem." If only others would learn the same thing.
best,
dale
"Thanks AJ. Yes, this was never meant to be much of a poem, mainly just a way to inform about the story. It was a write once and post sort of thing..."
I took for granted you had read the other comments, the error is mine, as this shows, since I had already conceded this was in fact not a good poem, my assumption was your comments were in regard to something other than the critique itself. My bad. I agree the poem lacks any substantial depth, or any depth at all. I also agree with your general thesis, "The subject doesn't save a bad poem." If only others would learn the same thing.
best,
dale
How long after picking up the brush, the first masterpiece?
The goal is not to obfuscate that which is clear, but make clear that which isn't.
The goal is not to obfuscate that which is clear, but make clear that which isn't.