01-26-2016, 01:38 PM
Good poem, but very subjective to a certain group. Needs better punctuation and grammar (less capitalization, more commas). The rhyming seems oddly balanced; I find more comfort when the rhyming follows the same lines or stanzas while reading a poem. The end is very abrupt, which doesn't suit the poems style, but I've sat here for about 5 minutes trying to come up with another ending and I'm at a loss, so maybe that is why you ended it the way you did? One last thing is that I really like is using "blaze" followed by "fire with fire". Whether intentional or not, it gives the poem a sinister charm to it!