American Beauties
#3
Hey 71, I love this. Thoughts below...

(03-13-2016, 06:34 AM)71degrees Wrote:  One spring the city we lived in was sex, nice opening
caught heat in cool, rainy weather "caught" is a wonderful word choice here

we slept next to a radiator by a window back to reality with a strong image
on the east side maybe a little worn - still works

it was our slice of space: damp sheets,
crepe-like wallpaper, orange and yellow

For one whole season, you left your vagina great line but might be more blunt if "one whole" was just "a"
where I could find it

Later, you thanked me, but explained
there’d been a change in our story it's not you it's me?  Big Grin

and you left just after all the American Beauties could probably strike "just" unless I'm missing a nuance
broke their first blossoms
Really enjoyable read. Good luck with it,
Paul
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Messages In This Thread
American Beauties - by 71degrees - 03-13-2016, 06:34 AM
RE: American Beauties - by Achebe - 03-13-2016, 07:11 AM
RE: American Beauties - by Tiger the Lion - 03-13-2016, 08:20 AM
RE: American Beauties - by Tracy Mitchell - 03-26-2016, 02:39 AM
RE: American Beauties - by 71degrees - 03-31-2016, 03:33 AM
RE: American Beauties - by whatisay-whatifeel - 03-31-2016, 01:43 PM
RE: American Beauties - by 71degrees - 04-03-2016, 09:44 AM
RE: American Beauties - by Mattp - 04-03-2016, 03:59 AM
RE: American Beauties - by (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻ - 04-04-2016, 11:15 AM
RE: American Beauties - by 71degrees - 04-04-2016, 09:41 PM
RE: American Beauties - by REW - 04-05-2016, 10:56 AM
RE: American Beauties - by 71degrees - 04-08-2016, 06:01 AM



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