03-13-2016, 11:48 AM
Although I haven't given you a full crit of the piece, if you need a second opinion on
"Though a thousand mile ramble, may his weary feet take"
for me "ramble" didn't change "walk a thousand miles" enough to make it less cliche or more interesting and "weary feet" made it worse. I'm sure you could think of a more interesting way to say it.
I'll try to get to to full critique tomorrow, sorry about that.
"Though a thousand mile ramble, may his weary feet take"
for me "ramble" didn't change "walk a thousand miles" enough to make it less cliche or more interesting and "weary feet" made it worse. I'm sure you could think of a more interesting way to say it.
I'll try to get to to full critique tomorrow, sorry about that.
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