03-20-2016, 06:43 AM
At first filled with comforting images, the reader's sense of quietude is subverted with the last line and we realise that the "roof" is most likely a railway bridge and the bed is cold not because its occupant hasn't been in it for long, but because it's probably made of concrete.
To my ear, L5 lapses into trochee and therefore becomes half a foot too long. The problem is, I can't see a solution because this is such an important line.
L6 -- murmurs?
L9 -- is it still called dew when it's residue from the rain?
To my ear, L5 lapses into trochee and therefore becomes half a foot too long. The problem is, I can't see a solution because this is such an important line.
L6 -- murmurs?
L9 -- is it still called dew when it's residue from the rain?