lipstick

[ellajam]

Hi, ms.redd, welcome to the pen. This read beautifully for me. I continue to have the same reaction to the opening line, that it reads more slowly than the rest, I am torn between it not being as good and it being a great entry into the piece, shakes up my thinking and pacing. I enjoy the wordplay, I still have a bit of confusion about the cup and nudity, both intimate, vs the "not for you", but that may clear with more time. A few comments below.

lipstick

(shades of red colors beauty “it’s not for you it’s for me” smudges left on the rim of a cup the color of blushing blood and fruit her lips enthralling her lips)
This line is not as coherent as the rest but it holds the keys and did not keep me from reading furher.

Red blood red rosebud red smeared across her lips red scrubbed in red red red stunning red coating her lips in a kiss between   color and colorless       colorlessness    red like a ribbon to make her look like she’s dressed even when        she’s   not      her mouth fraught with red hot
Love the colornessless and the ribbon. Love the siren/fire below and the jump...black below, and the red vs black. Love the blushing/nothing/bluffing.

She’s red but not a siren red, it’s a fire red, the kind that you touch and jump back jack with black on your fingertipsburning red   turning red       flames oh so lovely you’d love to immerse yourself she asks “Do you hear yourself?” a blushing red is a nothing red she wears a bluffing red not a loving red, stunningred shovingred crushing red, red red Ms.red (please,

don’t touch       the art)       “Beauty—

it’s not for you, it’s for me.” smudges left on the rim of a cup her lips enthralling her lips the color of blushing blood and fruit it’s not for you it’s not       asirenontherockslurein sailors red or a loving red merely a fire misread       her words useless mouth fruitless in regard to success do you hear yourself do you hear yourself do you       hear the       sound “please—don’t touch the art”             nonetheless       her lips are a kiss between cherry strawberry raspberry and       the fruitless

I am missing the s in lures in. I found the spacing at "do you...sound" didn't feel as right as in the rest of the piece.

Lovely read, thanks for posting it.