Water and Sky (Thread Closed)

[Alexis Of Wonderland]

Newbie here too so take this with a grain of salt. The rhyming needs work but I like the overall feel

Water and Sky

Once I stood on the top of a tide. <---------------------"I once stood on top of a tide" flows better to me
Since I was so high, it seemed fine to shut my eyes.<---It feels like "it seemed fine" takes away and could be removed
                                                                                      Maybe "Since I was so high, I closed my eyes."
Then I reached out my hand to touch the sky.  
Air slipped through my fingers, so I opened my eyes.<--Use "and" here instead of "so". Unless I'm missing the reason the air                                                                                                       between your fingers would cause you to open your eyes. 
I glanced below, and saw no tide
I was cornered by shallow water on every side.

From now on, I will not shut my eyes. <-----------------You could try "No longer, will I shut my eyes."
I look for deep waters, but don’t know where they lie