Devolution

[Mark Cecil]

Devolution second edit (I've tried mostly to put the poem in Iambic pentameter with this edit, rather than focus on issues raised over content.  Hopefully it is an improvement at least)

Some say we need a revolution now:
real power from the barrels of guns,
beheading by the Guillotine’s thin blade,
the overthrow of rulers by the ruled.
But they'll take the seats of power
and follow the former corrupt ways
devouring beasts because they too devour
till knuckles clenched bring others to the fore.

Some say that power must and will evolve
in the light of reason, and scientific thought.
The Enlightenment came to bring us hope
and matured into an age of machines
promising a blissful life, until the booming
guns of August taught us technology 
could not change our hearts
for no machine could operate our soul

Would be an example of "freer" verse with a slightly more comvincing thesis in S2

I'll take your suggestions regarding my thesis on board and I'll make a few changes but I think i'll stick to iambic pentameter