05-06-2017, 10:53 PM
(04-09-2017, 12:25 AM)Paul Welsh Wrote: Title: Loser
Coffin carriers high <<< naturally, I read this as a pallbearer ... "high" tho'? hmm as in drugs? if so, ok.
straight gaits pitch make cuff shoots <<< only line that I had real trouble with
cement steps over denomination trade <<< church steps / beginning of church imagery / but... wondering if this could be moved down / I imagine this to be after leaving church
holy water coolant drops <<< o.k. evokes more visions of church / bump up?
got ceiling fresco eyes <<< " " " " " " " " "
Altar ego trip <<< Kudos on what I'm reading as a double meaning / good ending line
Overall, good funeral imagery. I got the general feeling of someone posturing at the ceremony....
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