God, not me

God, not me

therabbitisme Offline

member

Posts: 28
Threads: 6
Joined: Jan 2018

#18

01-31-2018, 07:23 AM

While I might just be missing the point of it, I feel that the lines cutting off does not come across as you seem to want it to. It can be effective if the new timings are only slightly unnatural, but it feels a bit odd here. Very nice poem overall.

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Messages In This Thread

God, not me - by nibbed - 11-19-2017, 11:28 AM

RE: God, not me - by alonso ramoran - 11-20-2017, 06:13 AM

RE: God, not me - by nibbed - 11-20-2017, 06:55 AM

RE: God, not me - by Achebe - 11-20-2017, 08:23 AM

RE: God, not me - by nibbed - 11-21-2017, 12:05 AM

RE: God, not me - by vagabond - 11-20-2017, 12:16 PM

RE: God, not me - by Richard - 11-20-2017, 12:50 PM

RE: God, not me - by Achebe - 11-20-2017, 04:03 PM

RE: God, not me - by Rorf Asalis - 12-19-2017, 02:17 AM

RE: God, not me - by rollingbrianjones - 12-19-2017, 01:20 PM

RE: God, not me - by nibbed - 12-19-2017, 02:23 PM

RE: God, not me - by Huckleberry - 12-24-2017, 06:10 PM

RE: God, not me - by nibbed - 01-17-2018, 07:30 AM

RE: God, not me - by tectak - 01-18-2018, 12:04 AM

RE: God, not me - by nibbed - 01-18-2018, 11:50 AM

RE: God, not me - by nibbed - 01-19-2018, 01:20 AM

RE: God, not me - by tectak - 01-19-2018, 08:00 AM

RE: God, not me - by therabbitisme - 01-31-2018, 07:23 AM

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