01-09-2020, 09:16 AM
This is a good poem for 'Basic'. There is the Shakespearean allusion in your title, and an attempt to write in a formal, metrical style.
The first part of the poem does a good job of developing the metaphor of sailing down life's river over a few stanzas. Even so, there are a number of cliches such as 'sailing down the stream of life' but looking to anchor 'safe beyond the surging tide'. The latter is a seafaring cliche that makes no sense in the context of sailing down a river. There is no reason why winds should be 'flagrant' (from the Latin for blazing, and used in the context of something burning) - it just seems to be there because you were looking for a poetic sounding two syllable filler word.
So lots of room for improvement, but a good start.
The first part of the poem does a good job of developing the metaphor of sailing down life's river over a few stanzas. Even so, there are a number of cliches such as 'sailing down the stream of life' but looking to anchor 'safe beyond the surging tide'. The latter is a seafaring cliche that makes no sense in the context of sailing down a river. There is no reason why winds should be 'flagrant' (from the Latin for blazing, and used in the context of something burning) - it just seems to be there because you were looking for a poetic sounding two syllable filler word.
So lots of room for improvement, but a good start.