Teaching Myself to Miss You Differently

[JamesG]

Author note: Open to detailed crit, especially thoughts on the last stanza. This has been through a LOT of editing already though, so please be nice.

--
We only have this timeline, but somewhere 
we are backlit by balloon arches, plastic punch bowls
my palm on the small of your back,
the satin forest of your dress swaying 

I think it might be work better if you lost this first verse altogether and started the poem on the "and", as if the reader were entering a conversation on the middle.
 
and somewhere you are winking at me 
in the gender studies section 
converse squeaking closer 
to slip my number between the pages of Judith Butler for you I don't think this line needs to be so specific? Seems a bit clunky.
 
and somewhere you are pushing me hard 
against the slick wall of The Eagle
sinking to my knees, your hands in my hair
giving each other something nameless and electric
 I would lose this line break as it is unnecessary
but today I am teaching myself to love our untwined pasts
dance parties and midnight movies and porch swings 
contoured to bifurcated cities
 
and today I am leaning on the pressure points The repetion on "but today" and "and today" doesn't seem to work here
of my loneliness 
cooking for you in an empty kitchen
tasting you beneath the blankets of sleep
corseting myself into waiting
with the ache of taut bowstrings 
 
The weight of your absence
transcribes bruises across a body reaching "Reaching scanning" doesn't seem to work here for me 
scanning the horizon of queer bars, diner booths, book clubs
seeding cloudbursts and autumns heavy with longing
so that your story might envelope me in heady embrace 
those precious moments we collide This should describe something in the past tense, not the present,no?
 

Overall it is a good poem, and you are welcome to ignore my opinion