NOISE

[Magpie]

Yeah it's not really a short poem is it? I'll just pretend it's in basic critique so you're getting a free one. 
I've read your notes about how you've used capitalisation and italicisation to help transform a previous version, but I don't really think it has helped to change any emphasis in meaning. I've aligned it to the left, that centre shite is confusing as...   

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NOISE

So much Noise

Worries, expectations, failures

Plans, demands, guilt

I just need to be   -- this is fine as a first stanza and it could be a short poem in itself. The punctuation needs sorting, comma after 'failures', full stop or comma after 'noise' etc 

 

Appointments, assignments, meetings

Smiles, laughter, faces

Mirrors, masks, lies

Please, just let me be  -- this stanza seems to be a continuation of the first, and it's starting to read more like a list.

 

Too Much NOISE

Pain! Tears! Darkness!

Cross ... death ... resurrection -- don't need the ellipses 

I just want to be

 

Father, Son, Spirit

Truth, forgiveness, peace

Smiles, laughter, love

Now, I can just be  -- the last two stanzas take on a definite religious aspect which kind of leaves me guessing.

Hi Circle, I know that this is obviously a very personal poem to you. My comments are all based on the piece as a poem. For me a lot of it reads like a list, cryptic is good sometimes but only if it works. There seems to be some kind of journey in there and I am intrigued as to what that journey is. Some kind of acceptance through a religious comfort or experience. The reader is left wondering what the guilt is about or the mirrors and masks. It's good to get the reader to work but sometimes we need a little more help. Perhaps some metaphor or a bit more description would help.

Cheers for the read