Beauty and Nobility

[dukealien]

It’s been a while guys but I randomly came up with this in church lol

Distorted Beauty

Behold the dandelion,

a fluffy beauty and charm wanted at first to reverse "beauty" and "charm" to regularize rhythm, but as is it matches the bumpy "dandelion" so stet

full of promises
of prosperity,  this takes some thought to apply - but it does fit, with the following lines
which solely exists
to serve itself
and choke others,
feeding on their life.  In this respect the dandelion is a rather mild weed, but you need the beauty for contrast.  Only a Scotsman could like a thistle.

Now see the spider,
ever despised, feared  nice internal rhymes and alliteration in these 3-5 lines
endlessly and silently
toils, creating delicate  given the pervasive alliteration, is the inversion ("toils" here instead of leading the previous line) necessary?
works of magnificence, 
quietly ridding us
of those who steal
and feed on
what is not theirs.  A little harsh on flies and skeeters.  So the the spider is a cop?  (Just kidding.  Or not?)

In basic critique, this is quite nice, and hard to crit because it is, frankly, a lot like some things I write (personalizing objects and animals).  If you gave them names and dialog, it could be a fable.

But as is, aside from the one possible improvement above, only real suggestion is a different title.  The viewer's valuation is implied in the body of the poem, but "distorted" may be a bit much.  Perhaps more along the lines of misperceived, but better.

Good read, thanks for posting!  Now I have to go out and pull some dandelions from my lawn...