On Surviving an ICE Raid Without Health Insurance

[brynmawr1]

On Surviving an ICE Raid Without Health Insurance

They came for me at noon. I was eating tuna fish and
crackers, had just spread the relish carefully when my
front door exploded. The men, a stream of skully masks
and military contraband, barked a stream of orders nobody  used 'stream' twice in two lines and don't end on 'nobody' unless it means something
could understand. Held my little Bassett hound at gunpoint
just for kicks. It didn’t really work: he got exhausted  this whole line is filler and should be reworked
running willy-nilly there between the leather trees, 
the jungle of their boots. Kept hollering a storm, the baby
just wanted to play. “Shut him up,” the leader said,
a Christmas tree with ammo belts, then leaned back  recommend 'of'
on the trigger. A crack, a smell of phosphorus, then  gun powder has nothing to do with phosphorus.  Gun powder smells like sulfur; rotten eggs.
everything was wind. I woke up in a field of blood, bullets bullets wouldn't be visible.  Maybe shell casings?
spread around like grain, my best friend licking at the wound 
that didn’t even hurt. The roof was gone, you could see  Why was the roof gone? And what is the significance of seeing sky for miles in this context?
the sky spread out for miles. Walked out on the front porch,
the mailman handed me my life.   This last line sounds great.  What does it mean?

Hi,
Curious about your choice of line breaks.  Seems more dictated by meter than meaning in most cases.  Maybe rework into some alternative phrasing.
Overall, not too bad.
Thanks for sharing,
Bryn