Ash I Cross
#3
(09-12-2026, 01:48 AM)Deor Ana Log Wrote:  and through I glimpse                                  
there lies a wood
encroached in light
until the dawn

and moons do blow
one at a time
one, two, or five
into twilight

if loss be all
that life will cost
my youth be just
a road I crossed

to woods in snow,
saplings to ash
I am the road
lying so flat
I don't understand it one bit, but I can feel that it's not empty, so I look forward to hearing others' comments.

I'm not sure whether 'encroached in light' is the best phrase or the worst. It's a lovely novel phrase, but I can't make sense of it in the context.

The rhyme in the third stanza made me stop and look around for other rhymes that weren't there. Is that intentional?
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Messages In This Thread
Ash I Cross - by Deor Ana Log - 09-12-2026, 01:48 AM
RE: Ash I Cross - by matsunosuperfan - 09-12-2026, 02:28 AM
RE: Ash I Cross - by purplie - 2 hours ago



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