Peace

[grannyjill]

I have an image of a moment on the battlefield where all human activity is still...I see a panoramic view of dead and wounded lying motionless... as if they are holding their breath.
This stillness and silence is then broken by the incoherent cries of the soldiers who cannot believe they have actually survived the horror of it all.

The air fills.....perhaps conveys this shift in the scene.

In regard to your suggestion of rearrangement of lines, I think you are on to a winner there.
I tried it and it works really well.

What if I put -

Humanity survives
but only just.
Earth to earth
ashes to ashes
dust to dust...... (to drive home the funeral service element of this)

or is that too much?