We.

[QDeathstar]

Tectak, your posts have led me to go back and proof read several of my poems for appropriate punctuation. I hadn't even thought about it before. So, thanks for that.


Edit:


Sorry for the double post, I thought the forum automatically merged posts.

[tectak]

Tectak, your posts have led me to go back and proof read several of my poems for appropriate punctuation. I hadn't even thought about it before. So, thanks for that.


Edit:


Sorry for the double post, I thought the forum automatically merged posts.

Hi,
In this forum you post your piece with high hopes of general acceptance and to some degree critical ambivalence. It is in no one's interest to to rip new arseholes. You can do yourself a favour, though, by reading and editing your work before posting...most of the contributors would happily admit to this. One tip would be this. Read your piece out loud, not in a poetically hyperbolic voice but with natural intonation and unforced rhythm. Try to feel the "sense" in the poem. This is as much a skill as the writing of the thing in the first place...as you will quickly find out the first time you stumble in your reading. Read more poetry.
Best,
tectak

[QDeathstar]

Edit 3:

The line between the legs which yearns, burns, and begs,
consumes my soul: an unshakeable power.

The want beyond one wife yields pain, strain, and strife;
twists my thoughts: shivering, hurried, and hot.

The shallow within myself which extolls, cajoles, and contains;
justifies my sins - living life by margin.

The pain it causes (not me I'm free) shames, blames, and blinds;
sullies my love - dismisses arguments with apathy.