...in the Basement
#1
....in the Basement 

I've seen Fear on the face of men in war,
that wide-eyed riveted gaze.
On mine in front of a foe with a gun
who intended to extinguish my days.
But nothing would ever prepare me
for this tale I'm compelled to present
'bout hauling wet clothes to a dryer
downstairs in my buddy's basement.

First the lights went out. I dropped the load.
The basement silence held two sounds
like knives slicing air in the distance
and thudding feet walking soft ground.
I lunged for the stairway in darkness
but the Thing scraped my ribcage so !
At the top of the stairs, I could just see the door,
only seven steps to go.
Its breath singed the hairs on the back of my neck.
I jumped two steps, leaving five.
I bounded two more and that left me three
with the Monster on my heels and alive.
I lunged for the door, ope’ and closed it.
All in one motion I did !
It snarled and pounded and pounded.
My escape must have blown its lid.

Each pounding lifted me off the door.
Cracked wood pieces propelled to the floor.
Ejected like bullets were door hinge screws.
Wood began crumbling.
It was coming through !
I shivered and sweated in silent fright.
Awaiting the crash ! Awaiting the fight !
Then suddenly ! All went silent !
And again my ears heard the sound.
Knifeclaws, slicing air in the distance,
started fading and melting, going down.

The breath returned to my body
and the sweat began to dry.
Why it stopped? I'll never know.
I'm lucky and I won't ask why !

When I told my vacationing buddy,
he chuckled and said I was crazed.
But I saw him back home from vacation today
with his "wide-eyed riveted gaze."
So, don't laugh at anyone saying,
"There's a Monster in your basement, my friend."
You can bet your sweet life, I would never forget it
or ever chuckle again!

Namyh

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          
Reply
#2
Hyman, err.. Namyh,

Well, this is well written and clear, I'm just a little confused about the point. Evidently this is suppose to be humorous, but just as evidently I am missing the punch line. Sorry.

dale
How long after picking up the brush, the first masterpiece?

The goal is not to obfuscate that which is clear, but make clear that which isn't.
Reply
#3
(11-21-2014, 04:31 AM)Erthona Wrote:  Hyman, err.. Namyh,

Well, this is well written and clear, I'm just a little confused about the point. Evidently this is suppose to be humorous, but just as evidently I am missing the punch line. Sorry.

dale

I thought all the racket was an unbalanced washing machine in the spin cycle. My own makes quite the monstrous uproar when the clothing tangles and slips to one side. I have to run very quickly to quiet the bucking bull before it kicks in the wall! However, I realized my timeline was off when you dropped the wet load after the assail. Nonetheless, dropping a load was a humorous pun.  Big Grin
My new watercolor: 'Nightmare After Christmas'/Chris
Reply
#4
DaleSometimes in life you just never know when you have to summon all your strength just to survive the confrontation of an unseen enemy or a real one. Consider this poetic piece a shortcut preview to what might be when you least expect it. Humor was not necessarily the evident intent here but sometimes nervous laughter is all we have left to lessen a fear that’s got us trembling and it might be just the thing that puts a ‘punch line’ in your day and saves it. Namyh  

Reply
#5
ChristopherS Believe it or not, I used to tell my very young kids, now grown with their own kids, that if they didn’t clean their room, they would be put in the basement to face the monster there. Okay! Okay! I was a meany but it worked. Therapists have subsequently said that many childhood experiences still linger in our minds. Now I know why my grown kids don’t have a basement and still don’t clean their rooms. LOL. I’m so very happy you stopped to see what all the racket was about and enjoyed ChristopherS. Namyh
Reply
#6
I'm a little lost on the direction of the poem...?
Reply
#7
(12-05-2014, 05:00 AM)Claudia-Larsen Wrote:  I'm a little lost on the direction of the poem...?

Why don't you start by stating what you start think the direction might be based on your careful reading.
Reply
#8
(12-05-2014, 05:00 AM)Claudia-Larsen Wrote:  I'm a little lost on the direction of the poem...?

Claudia – The direction of the poem is simple. It’s up the stairs, grab the wife and kids, exit the house and leave the monster behind.
Nothin’ to it. Just follow this yellow brick poem. Namyh
Reply




Users browsing this thread:
Do NOT follow this link or you will be banned from the site!