Chomo Lungma

[srijantje]

solitude on everest
never an option
ants in the snow

[Erthona]

SJJ,

I get the first two lines as I know that people who have been on Everest tend to disappear and never show back up, but I don't get the ants line unless it is about people in line from a distance. Help me out here buddy?

Dale

[just mercedes]

This made me see this https://charlottejonesillustrations.file...zeshin.jpg

[srijantje]

It's because there's rows of people wanting to go up there,waiting for each other to clear the summit,meanwhile there's dead bodies you have to pass by

---

that's a great pick,mercedes,positive though,while my "haiku"is pretty negative

[bena]

I did get your ants (I've written an entire poem where the metaphor is ants and is about death)

You've a great haiku here.

love ya,
mel.

[monmac]

Do you need to memtion Everest in the first line.
Could something like
Solitude on her slopes
Or solitude on the mountain

You title has it covered already

also you do not keep to the 5/7/5
Do you find this restrictive?

[RiverNotch]

Great haiku! But yeah, since the title already says "Everest", I don't think you need to say it on the first line.

[bena]

monoc, most ppl find sticking to the antiquated 5/7/5 restrictive these days. While it can certainly can be used, it is more often not now. (sneaks off)

bena

[srijantje]

good point about mentioning everest,I find the name sort of offensive anyway,but in line of what's happening there

solitude on the mountain
never an option
ants in the snow