Thought provoking. Truly, what happens if there's a civilisational meltdown? Paper records could mean the difference between going back a hundred years and going back a thousand.
Crib: understand that a lotus opens and closes with the sun, but as that's not related to the papyrus reed, the juxtaposition with paper / civilisation isn't satisfying.
(09-15-2016, 04:32 PM)Achebe Wrote: Thought provoking. Truly, what happens if there's a civilisational meltdown? Paper records could mean the difference between going back a hundred years and going back a thousand.
Crib: understand that a lotus opens and closes with the sun, but as that's not related to the papyrus reed, the juxtaposition with paper / civilisation isn't satisfying.
The juxtaposition is meant to be through their common Nile/Egyptian source (and the blue lotus apparently rises with the dawn, too, which must be fun to watch if you have the patience). Needs to be clearer - thanks!
Going back to paper from digital would be like (but much worse than) the Late Roman/Dark Ages move to parchment: parchment lasts forever unless something eats it, but you could get papyrus by the mile when Egypt was open for business; for parchment, you have to kill an animal every time you want to write something (or scrape an old page, erasng its contents... though not thoroughly enough to hide them from modern investigators).
This was very thought provoking! I felt that it was a very good embodiment of the moral dilemma that we, as a society struggle with. I also appreciated the fact that the message was written under the parallel to Ancient Egypt. It was very artfully written and I look forward to reading more of your work in the future.
I really like writing about writing, this is history included.
(09-14-2016, 09:57 PM)dukealien Wrote: Ages of Reed and Lotus
The paperless future is always five years away because no one trusts a paperless past.
Egypt. Giant reeds, papyrus, rise
from brown Nile water, columns symbolize
protection, safety, bearing up the skies.
Sacred lotus floats near, blue and bright
in sunlight but at sunset sinks from sight
drugged metaphor of death, rebirth, soul’s plight.
Reeds split and glued form frail papyrus scrolls
scribes diligently copy, for their rolls
convey troop musters, tax and subject polls.
Unlike the lotus constantly reborn
papyrus lasts but few years when it’s torn
from Egypt’s sandy desiccating bourne.
Barbarians take Egypt, halting trade; I feel like I don't know enough history to grasp this paragraph
uncopied Roman records rot and fade; I understand all the egypt but this seems the only rome part
Rome falls, administration mute, decayed. unless the west refers to rome as well because modern day has so much in common with it
So lotus-like the West sinks into dark
and scribeless ignorance until ink’s mark
impressed on rag-laid paper lights a spark.
But will its records, digitized, survive digitized seems to be the only reference to modern day
float like the sacred lotus, never dive which i want more of after reading the quote at the beginning
in darkness - needing paper to revive?
I love the format, re read it several times just to enjoy the phrasing. Thanks for sharing
This is different - critics usually advise to get rid of filler and superfluous lines; here the consensus seems to favor adding information (for example, that the Romans picked up the Egyptian practice of papyrus record-keeping and became dependent on it, and that commerce with Egypt was halted by quite a diverse lot of barbarians (the Vandals, for example) even before the Muslim conquest of Egypt (which had such dire consequences for the Library of Alexandria).
Thanks for the encouragement, edit to follow after research to get the parties' names right.
The evocation of an ancient world is very strong, and therefore makes the ultimate message of the importance of record-keeping traditions all the more poignant. You dirty Luddite, you Thank you for the read. - Jack xxx
"We believe that we invent symbols. The truth is that they invent us; we are their creatures, shaped by their hard, defining edges." - Gene Wolfe
(09-19-2016, 05:36 AM)dukealien Wrote: This is different - critics usually advise to get rid of filler and superfluous lines; here the consensus seems to favor adding information (for example, that the Romans picked up the Egyptian practice of papyrus record-keeping and became dependent on it, and that commerce with Egypt was halted by quite a diverse lot of barbarians (the Vandals, for example) even before the Muslim conquest of Egypt (which had such dire consequences for the Library of Alexandria).
Thanks for the encouragement, edit to follow after research to get the parties' names right.
Wasn't it Julius Caesar who burned the library first?
(09-19-2016, 05:36 AM)dukealien Wrote: This is different - critics usually advise to get rid of filler and superfluous lines; here the consensus seems to favor adding information (for example, that the Romans picked up the Egyptian practice of papyrus record-keeping and became dependent on it, and that commerce with Egypt was halted by quite a diverse lot of barbarians (the Vandals, for example) even before the Muslim conquest of Egypt (which had such dire consequences for the Library of Alexandria).
Thanks for the encouragement, edit to follow after research to get the parties' names right.
Wasn't it Julius Caesar who burned the library first?
"First" would seem to be the important qualification. Apparently at least four groups have had a go at Alexandrian libraries (of which there were at least three in different parts of the city). Caesar bagged one near the docks, Antony restocked with books looted from Pergamon, a couple of other Romans picked off one or the other every couple of hundred years either by accident or for religious reasons (Christian era). One is left to wonder what the Muslims found to burn when they finally arrived, or if the whole business with the Muslims was an echo of Theodosius' innings with the torch. Even the reasoning is similar - those monotheists! (Wikipedia is advertising for an Egyptian scholar to do something scholarly with their article on the subject.)
It was definitely the Vandals (great seamen, which we don't normally associate with barbarians other than Vikings) who first interdicted Roman trade with Egypt, though. I think.
The paperless future is always five years away because no one trusts a paperless past.
Egypt. Giant reeds, papyrus, rise
from brown Nile water, columns symbolize
protection, safety, bearing up the skies.
Sacred lotus floats near, blue and bright
in sunlight, but at sunset sinks from sight
Nile metaphor of death, rebirth, soul’s plight.
Reeds split and glued form frail papyrus scrolls
scribes diligently copy, for their rolls
convey troop musters, tax and subject polls.
Unlike the lotus constantly reborn
papyrus lasts but few years when it’s torn
from Egypt’s sandy desiccating bourne.
Rome, mighty, conquering, adopts the best
from Egypt, freighting rolled papyrus west;
scribes daily copy rule and manifest.
Barbarians block Egypt, halting trade;
uncopied Roman records rot and fade;
Rome falls, administration mute, decayed.
So lotus-like the West sinks into dark
and scribeless ignorance until ink’s mark
impressed on rag-laid paper lights a spark.
But can its records, digitized, survive
float like the sacred lotus, never dive
in darkness - needing paper to revive?
Finally got around to editing this one. Thanks to the critics and other commenters: hope the few changes (and one added stanza) improve and clarify as suggested. And that the new barbarians don't know how to conduct a DDOS attack (except that, apparently, they do).
Non-practicing atheist
Thank you for the read. - Jack xxx
