When I make you laugh
#1
When I make you laugh

time stops.

fear drops 

its empirical drawers
and I rejoice.
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#2
(02-07-2017, 02:35 PM)Tiger the Lion Wrote:  When I make you laugh

time stops.

fear drops 

its empirical drawers
and I rejoice.

okay, this did in fact make me laugh. though i wonder --- does fear drop its drawers to moon, or to rape? if i were more political, rape -- best prepare the pepper spray.
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#3
(02-07-2017, 02:35 PM)Tiger the Lion Wrote:  When I make you laugh

time stops.

fear drops 

its empirical drawers
and I rejoice.

Tiger, a very enjoyable piece. Big Grin
Makes me smile.

My quibble is over the word, 'empirical.' Fear overrides reason; fear makes people behave like animals, not scientists. Unless you're using that word in a way I'm not familiar with, that bit doesn't quite sit right.

The rest I love.
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#4
Oops sorry about the empty post.
  
The poem made me giggle too; though I'm thinking some extra drinks will help you loose your inhibitions like that as well. I love the word "empirical" in there, because humor is one of the richest of human experiences!
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#5
Thanks River, Lizzie and Zella. I try to make small footprints when I write lately. This is a simple (apolitical) glimpse at how the N feels when he makes someone he loves laugh. "Empirical" is a pun dammit! And I was just playing with enjambment and spacing. Thanks for reading.
Paul
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