haiku

[billy]

cutting long grass
with blunt-bladed lawnmower--
wife mocks through window

[Wildcard]

This is neat Billy. It makes start thinking of the wife and husband in very specific ways just from the very few words you've written. Good job.

[billy]

thanks AA

[Leanne]

Doesn't work for me I'm afraid... I mow the lawn at our place, he's afraid of spiders and all the other hidden garden nasties Shoulda sharpened your blades, lazy bugger.

But the dynamic does work well, there's a neat little undercurrent.

[billy]

thanks for the feedback, in reality i'm in a condo on the 15th floor but i used to have one of those push and go antique mowers hehe.

[Lizzie]

cutting long grass
with blunt-bladed lawnmower--
wife mocks through window

This one gave me quite a chuckle, thank you. You're short a syllable in the first line, so why not hang the syllable count and trim it all down (pun intended)?

cutting long grass
with blunt blades
wife mocks through window

[rayheinrich]

Doesn't work for me I'm afraid... I mow the lawn at our place, he's afraid of spiders and all the other hidden garden nasties  Shoulda sharpened your blades, lazy bugger.

But the dynamic does work well, there's a neat little undercurrent.

Fixed:
cutting long grass
with blunt-bladed lawnmower--
spouse mocks through window


(And yes, billy's got a nice one here.)