Broke Path

[Bunx]

Difference in streets
cracked concrete with dreams unseen
no soles and bruised feet.

[wasellajam]

The difference in streets
signals where the hungry are
no soles and bruised feet.

Hi Bunx. I'm liking this. I think the middle line could still use some work, something to get "are" off the break.

signals where the hungry (trod, wait, rest) something
signals where hungry souls (trod, wait, rest) anything you want, that gets rid of both weak words.

So I think you could tweak this a little, looking forward to seeing what you do, if anything. thanks for posting it.

[Bunx]

Hey Ella I rewrote the whole line, I think that paints a stronger picture of what I'm trying to get across.

Thanks for the suggestion!

[Magpie]

The difference in streets
cracked concrete with dreams unseen
no soles and bruised feet.

If I was extremely picky I would have to say that 'difference' has 3 syllables, which would give the first line 6 syllables, you could drop the 'The' or stick a squiggly thing in diff'rence.

But anyway I'm not extremely picky, so 

nice poem.

[Bunx]

Good catch Magpie! I'll ditch the "the"