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		One-eyed winter, bent-backed hag, sheslopes across the shadowed corries,
 harvesting the weak and wasted,
 rinsing Alba with her wake.
 
 I have seen her, outside in and
 boiling through the mists of Mary’s
 mildness, driving ice before her,
 genesis beneath her feet.
 
 Throw your words of he-said, he-said,
 jealous black and whitely righteous,
 onto fires of harvest’s ending,
 Cailleach cannot see a cross.
 
 Call the mists to veil the vistas
 ancient under concrete scarring;
 none may yoke her, land or lady:
 she is threefold, she is one.
 
 
 
 
 
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		will get back to this later.
 
 
		
	 
	
	
	
		
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		no worries
	 
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		07-22-2011, 06:39 PM 
(This post was last modified: 07-22-2011, 06:41 PM by billy.)
	
	 
		i couldn't wait.   (07-22-2011, 03:03 PM)Leanne Wrote:  One-eyed winter, bent-backed hag, sheslopes across the shadowed corries,
 harvesting the weak and wasted,
 rinsing Alba with her wake.
 
 I have seen her, outside in and
 boiling through the mists of Mary’s
 mildness, driving ice before her,
 genesis beneath her feet.
 
 Throw your words of he-said, he-said,
 jealous black and whitely righteous,
 onto fires of harvest’s ending,
 Cailleach cannot see a cross.
 
 Call the mists to veil the vistas
 ancient under concrete scarring;
 none may yoke her, land or lady:
 she is threefold, she is one.
 lots of Scottish references. i presume you  wrote 'cailleach' and not 'the cailleach' to keep the meter. 
i love the last line of the 1st verse 
was lost with 'the one eyed winter' and all i can think of is the witches from macbeth, something i'm certain of considering it is rife with Gaelic lore. i'm not to well up on macbeth but this screams it. (it's okay if i'm wrong    ) i think the imagery is great  
the 2nd verse is my fave, it paints a personal picture.
 
if i had one small nit it would be the enjambment. mainly the 1st line. it is obvious it was done that way for meter and because of that it does work. it niggles a little as it does    
it has that mystical allusion  that a good poem about this subject needs.  
i really enjoyed it, and more so i enjoyed deciphering it.  jmo
 
ps loved the use of corries    
thanks for a great read. 
	
		
	 
	
	
	
		
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		Leanne
 I work harder on your poems than I do my own.
 Google is a wonderful tool.
 
 An dà shealladh....couldn't find this. I'm lost already.
 
 I read billys response, couldn't find the correlation to Macbeth.
 
 Cailleach....old hag...Doll made during harvest, passed from farmer
 to farmer until the harvest is done.
 
 
 I think this is a religious poem.
 I have trouble with Alba unless it refers to a doll.
 
 I think you are referring to Mary Magdalene, Mother Mary, Mary as a
 disciple.
 
 I hate it that you're smarter than me.
 
 The first two stanza's are good.
 The last two are excellent. Even if I have it wrong.
 
 
 
 
 
 Found the meaning of the title with some research.
 
 I have to remember that you're Scottish.
 
 Now I think you're talking about Scotland or  Ireland and the
 different people who have inhabited them and their religious
 views.
 
 Still can't place the one-eyed winter.
 
 I think the concrete scarring is streets or parking lots.
 Three folds into one would refer to the people again
 She(Scotland or Ireland) is one, despite the convergence of
 different religious backgrounds.
 
 mysts of Mary
 Genesis beneath her feet
 Cailleach cannot see a cross.
 
 This must refer to christian beliefs trying to take hold.
 
 I hope I got at least one of these right.
 
 Cheers
 David
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
		
	 
	
	
	
		
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		07-23-2011, 06:49 AM 
(This post was last modified: 07-23-2011, 07:02 AM by Leanne.)
	
	 
		Thank you, gentlemen.  The Cailleach is most often represented as a one-eyed, blue-faced giantess -- she is not cruel, but she doesn't accept weakness in her people or her land as she cleanses and culls with the winter.  I expect Shakespeare had a bit of her as the threefold spinner of fate in mind when he wrote the witches, but they're tainted by that Christian viewpoint of crones as evil or contemptible.  In Celtic lore, she is both creator and destroyer -- and her other aspect, during the summer months, is the Bride.  Not surprisingly, the Christians decided that they could appropriate this beautiful young goddess, who fit in with their ideas of womanhood, and turn her into a placid saint.  The old woman they ignored, silly buggers. 
David, you're right about the concrete.  You can put whatever veneer you like across a living surface, but in time it will crack and fall away.
An dà shealladh  roughly translates as "the two sights", the ability to see through the veil to the world of spirits and gods.  And Alba means Scotland    
Billy, duly noted on the enjambment but as you've surmised, it's purely deliberate and I'd rather the meter stayed intact.
 
Many thanks to you both.
	
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		Couldn't you write haphazardly mortal poem?  
PS. If you can, try your hand at giving some of the others a bit of feedback. If you already have, thanks, can you do some more?
 
		
	 
	
	
	
		
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		 (07-24-2011, 05:46 AM)Aish Wrote:  Couldn't you write haphazardly mortal poem?
 
  
Sure, I have loads about vomit and poo if you'd like    
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		 (07-24-2011, 10:53 AM)Leanne Wrote:   (07-24-2011, 05:46 AM)Aish Wrote:  Couldn't you write haphazardly mortal poem?
 
  Sure, I have loads about vomit and poo if you'd like
  
Only if you want mine on snot and pulled teeth    
The triune maiden/mother/crone is one of my favorite themes. I'm rather partial to The Morrigan. 
	 
PS. If you can, try your hand at giving some of the others a bit of feedback. If you already have, thanks, can you do some more?
 
		
	 
	
	
	
		
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		I've been called an old crow a time or two myself   
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