A Love Letter to my dear one.

[grannyjill]

I'm sometimes heart-weary, exasperated
with human-kind. Which is why
I yell and flounce,
bounce harsh words
off the kitchen walls, and
'forget' to give you a morning kiss.

But, you know this. You know me.
Forty years my whipping boy.
The one who
drives away demons who crouch in the dark
amd crushes trouble-making imps
who masquerade as thoughts.

You're my hero, in the guise of Clark Kent,
who rescues me from choppy seas
to carry me spluttering to the sands,
who commands me - be still.

God was having a good day
when he pushed me to you
and you to me.
Two awkward people
Unversed, unrehearsed in love.
stumbling, blindfolded.
reaching out
till we felt God's nudge
and brushed against each other.
It brought so much
to me - to us.

[Leanne]

You know, the most romantic part in this entirely romantic poem is "two awkward people, unversed, unrehearsed in love" -- that's just gorgeous.

My only concern is the slight incongruity of Clark Kent rescuing anyone from choppy seas -- he's such an urban figure, he really needs a less piratical setting

I do like this a lot though, it's all I love best about proper, grownup love.

[grannyjill]

Yea, I see what you mean - he's a proper Clark Kent and would probably only be able to rescue me from a puddle, or a paper-cut.

"who helps me down from off the bus
with little moaning
and lots of fuss"

"He makes me coffee when I'm dry
and brings me tissues when I cry"

"He makes me take a brolly
even though the sun is out
(you never know, do you dear
if there's rain about)"

"He calms me when I lose my rag
he finds my glasses, phone and bag
And guides me safely out the door
And reminds me what I'm going for."


...........stuff like that.....I'm a lucky person.

[Aish]

This is sweet. Not cloying, but deeply sentimental in way a couple can only know when they have seen the best and worst in one another for decades and still gaze lovingly at their partner. You are indeed, a lucky woman.

[grannyjill]

Why thank you, Aish! I'm not a romantic person, far from it, and neither is he. But romance isn't everything...he is a lovely man who is unfailingly cheerful despite living with me. What more can I ask?

[billy]

I'm sometimes heart-weary, exasperated
with human-kind. Which is why
I yell and flounce,
bounce harsh words
off the kitchen walls, and
'forget' to give you a morning kiss.

But, you know this. You know me.
Forty years my whipping boy.
The one who
drives away demons who crouch in the dark
amd crushes trouble-making imps
who masquerade as thoughts.

You're my hero, in the guise of Clark Kent,
who rescues me from choppy seas
to carry me spluttering to the sands,
who commands me - be still.

God was having a good day
when he pushed me to you
and you to me.
Two awkward people
Unversed, unrehearsed in love.
stumbling, blindfolded.
reaching out
till we felt God's nudge
and brushed against each other.
It brought so much
to me - to us.

exasperated feels like it would read better at the beginning of the 2nd line.
and an and spelled wrong.
It felt like it was personal to me. as though i was part of it. i was warm and carried time within it. the last few lines felt a little ott but that's just a me thing i think. i enjoyed it.

thanks for the read.

[grannyjill]

Thanks, billy - I had clocked the tangled-fingered 'amd' and thought that I had amended it, obviously, not.

"I agree, re last verse" she said, wearily, "most of my poetry ends with a whimper not a bang since I cannot maintain my genius for more than a couple of minutes"

There is no reason why the 'exasperated' cannot be moved down - except I've seen it sitting at the end of that line for so long - it seems natural to be there!