Posts: 1,568
Threads: 317
Joined: Jun 2011
01-12-2013, 06:19 AM
(This post was last modified: 06-19-2015, 07:11 AM by Todd.)
The night was the night.
The mosquitoes' whine sounded
like mosquitoes whining, and the moon
was large and glowed
in the darkness like the moon.
Metaphors and similes withered like
comparisons we could no longer make.
Everything was simply what it was.
The original poem and comments can be found
here
It could be worse
Posts: 5,057
Threads: 1,075
Joined: Dec 2009
Posts: 109
Threads: 11
Joined: Jul 2012
Hey Todd,
I love how this is written, using similes and metaphors while not using it (I didn't think that was possible while still being amazingly poetic)
A very well written poem that definitely belongs here, let's just hope you're not psychic though.
Posts: 29
Threads: 19
Joined: Nov 2012
Very sad poem. Every writer reading this cried on the inside. Very well written.
Isn't It Evil to Live Backwards~Loaded Lux
I'm Batman, act up and I'll squeeze Hecklers/You'll die before the first clip drops, Heath Ledger!
Posts: 1,568
Threads: 317
Joined: Jun 2011
I'm so glad to see that people agree with my assessment of this poem -- it really did affect me deeply and I definitely think it's a standout that deserved to be paid more attention.
It could be worse
Posts: 41
Threads: 8
Joined: Jan 2013
I felt calm while reading this, but kind of eerie and depressed too. I felt a bit of nihilism too, which I enjoyed.
Posts: 2,360
Threads: 230
Joined: Oct 2010
Thank you all for the kind words, it's always nice to know when a poem has an impact.
The secret of poetry is cruelty.--Jon Anderson
Posts: 2,360
Threads: 230
Joined: Oct 2010
Thank you Heart and Saima. Appreciate the comments
The secret of poetry is cruelty.--Jon Anderson
Posts: 378
Threads: 8
Joined: Mar 2013
A script for a horror film.
Posts: 280
Threads: 42
Joined: Mar 2013
I was really moved, when I read it. I felt sad, but serene. A beautiful poem.
Posts: 845
Threads: 57
Joined: Aug 2013
Too tranquil for such a catastrophic moment and hence the sinister beauty herein. Nice work and selection to spotlight. Come on, everyone knows that the moon would extinguish that night!
My new watercolor: 'Nightmare After Christmas'/Chris
Posts: 845
Threads: 57
Joined: Aug 2013
Well, we will try to keep poetry alive here!
My new watercolor: 'Nightmare After Christmas'/Chris