10-25-2014, 01:54 PM
The point of view is sketchy, like others have said, Me, You, Them?
And the use of blanket twice, I agree with the others, another word would be fitting. Shadows, Hiding behind the veil.
The overall tone and feel that I get from it, is the blackness of depression. The sense of loss that one feels when they are all alone and no one can hear them. The bleakness that one feels is known, and the wanting to "feel the sunshine" saddens me.
I like it!
And the use of blanket twice, I agree with the others, another word would be fitting. Shadows, Hiding behind the veil.
The overall tone and feel that I get from it, is the blackness of depression. The sense of loss that one feels when they are all alone and no one can hear them. The bleakness that one feels is known, and the wanting to "feel the sunshine" saddens me.
I like it!