Zen (song)
#1
Here's a (very) short song I wrote the other night, I figured I might as well throw it on here. As you'll be able to hear, I'm not particular good at both singing, or playing guitar, but I like to make up little songs. If anyone wants the chords, feel free to ask me.




Lyrics:

The sweet loam smell beside a pond
and company that’s very fond
of sitting still and breathing air
trying to become aware
of nothing.

Like rainfall on a metal roof
and breakfast with some handpicked fruit
or summer nights beside a lake
or morning sun that makes your waking
painless.

Zen, Zen

I’ve read most of the holy books
but they can’t beat a sober look
at all the spiders spinning webs
and the roosters and their hens
living.

Zen, Zen, Zen
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#2
Hi Wjames,

I really like this.  The words the music, all of it works together really well.  Smile  Thank you for sharing and for including the sound clip.  It improved my experience and understanding of the poem when I heard the peaceful music that goes with it.  

-Quix
The Soufflé isn’t the soufflé; the soufflé is the recipe. --Clara 
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#3
Another beautiful song - love it.
If I can make a couple of suggestions:

1. You might try pausing for a couple of beats before the last line of each stanza. Creates a nice little moment of anticipation.
2. Perhaps you might try a variation in S2 - at the moment it's 3 rather similar stanzas.
~ I think I just quoted myself - Achebe
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#4
Thanks for listening guys. I'll try the pause you recommend Achebe, plus I want to write lyrics for two more verses/stanzas so they might make altering the stanza unnecessary.
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