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Constellation
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09-09-2024, 11:51 PM
Constellation
Constellations shine bright like Palestine in cell. I wish I could fly. To save every life
Only one thing is impossible for God: To find any sense in any copyright law on the planet.
--mark twain Bunx
12-05-2024, 12:50 AM
I love the idea. The imagery is fantastic but it feels a but forced into the haiku format--most clearly evident by the extra disjointed line at the end and the lack of flow throughout: "Palestine in [a] cell" would make more sense and sound better, but it doesn't fit in the form. Just feels like it needs more precision and care--pruning for this specific form.
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