Poetry Chess Game -- Brandon vs. Todd

[brandontoh]

Yeah, I try to do forms not already in the poetry practice exercises section. Hopefully more people will get to know about them, other than the two of us. This one is called the Balasi Stanza.

http://bensonofjohn.co.uk/poetry/formsse...i%20Stanza

To Zinc
Qg4

Come on Zinc, let's dance;
Get lost in this trance.
Get high, then we shall sing.
You said you're crazy,
And your life hazy;
So let this waltz make clean
All uncertainties
And bring harmony.
Zinc, will you be my queen?

----------------------------------
Okay, this is a really embarrassing poem to post. I just wrote it but well, it's about my high school crush. Her nickname is Zinc, and well, I'm over it but you know, memories.

By the way, I have this idea for a poem which I think is not bad. Now, I know I can just workshop it, but I'm hoping for a suitable move to post it under. =) I don't think any guy will say it's a bad concept. It's about being touched by a woman after all.

[cidermaid]

[quote='brandontoh' pid='114038' dateline='1359728000']
Yeah, I try to do forms not already in the poetry practice exercises section. Hopefully more people will get to know about them, other than the two of us. This one is called the Balasi Stanza.


Hi Brandon, really appreciating the introduction of the new forms. Love this one will have a go at it as soon as i get a moment. Came to watch at the party late, but been really enjoying following the progress. Some great proto reads have been pumped out.

[Todd]

Love poems are always embarrassing. That's sort of the point. (Hi AJ)

Here's my move and Balasi Stanza:

Rapunzel

Be6

A golden stairway
Tress superhighway
A prince and his tower
Eager to befriend
By morn’ now descend
Flaccid robbed of power
Better he dangles
Then sullen tangles
Of this yellow bower

[brandontoh]

Hey, you did write something good for this form. =) Here's the next one!

http://bensonofjohn.co.uk/poetry/formsse...box=Emmett

Foxy
Nhf5

Don't let your eyes deceive,
Let integrity be the one leading.
Your foxtail is clearly showing --
Eyes have a penchant for mischief;
Deceive me once more, and I'll stop forgiving.

--------------------------------------------------

The game is ending soon. =x

[Todd]

I know the game is ending soon. I have no illusions. I like what you did with the form.

Here's my poem and my move.

Every Snowflake

Bxf5

If as snowflakes we’re unique,
as one might describe a blind date.
Snowflakes never preen or prate.
We’re confusing different with mystique.
Unique won’t melt easily, and often won’t elate.

[brandontoh]

Emmett is really interesting. As long as you put in some effort it'll flow quite nicely for some reason. It's only 5 lines, but it's a joy to write. The next one's a septolet.

http://www.shadowpoetry.com/resources/wip/septolet.html

Vengeance
Nxf5

Life for life,
In memory of
him.

Unaware
Of their place
As mere
Tools.

[Todd]

I love the septocet. Its everything I like. Your poem is very appropriate. I'll be dragging this out as long as I can. Here's my septocet and my move (my only one really):


I Wrote My Suicide Note

g6

Beneath your
eyelids; so you
would see.

In hieroglyphics,
so you would
never
understand

[brandontoh]

What's the everything you speak of? By the way I really like yours. You made use of the compulsory stanza break really well. Not coincidentally the first poem I posted in the forum is a Septolet as well. I'll be back with my move once I'm home. Yet to decide on the form, but it'll be fun.

[Todd]

Just the format 14 words, minimalist and tight. I wish it was no more than 14, as I would have liked to try for eight or nine.

[brandontoh]

This one is a tyburn!

http://www.shadowpoetry.com/resources/wip/tyburn.html


Nxe7+

Fearless,
Peerless,
Swiftest,
Strongest.
Right now, I'm a fearless, peerless knight.
Dueling with my swiftest, strongest strikes.

[Todd]

My poor queen. Here's my Tyburn from the current news. Malign and Equine are adjectives up top and verbs below. I think the form allows it. Though I'm taking creative license with the verb to equine.

Burger King

Rxe7

Benign
Divine
Malign
Equine

These burgers aren't benign, divine now.
In this mix, they malign, equine cow.

[rowens]

I made a New Year's resolution one year not to eat fast food all year long. It worked, and I make it every year.

[brandontoh]

You shouldn't have moved it to e7. =x I think that works well though. Poetry is not meant to be so strict; in my opinion anyway. This next one is called a minute poem. =)

http://www.shadowpoetry.com/resources/wip/minute.html

Kathy (Catty)
Qh4

'I'll stay,' promise under moonlight,
Witnessed by night.
With such ardour,
You enamoured.

With those words, the night got coloured
Into ballad;
And I let go
Unto the flow.

Hoping if my sanity cracked
You'll bring me back.
Please, do not laud
A girl so flawed.

[Todd]

I made a New Year's resolution one year not to eat fast food all year long. It worked, and I make it every year.

That's a good resolution. I remember an old Steve Martin routine where he implied that all their food came out of a vat full of stuff. Probably a lot of truth there.

[rowens]

I remember an old Steve Martin routine where he had a puppet coming out of his open fly.

..........................

Sometimes, though, I am in a mood for nasty stuff: like beer, onions, and some kind of slimey burger. But then I just fix them myself.

---

And I wanted to ask brandontoh if Taylor Swift put that semicolon in, or if he did.

[Todd]

I remember an old Steve Martin routine where he had a puppet coming out of his open fly.

..........................

Sometimes, though, I am in a mood for nasty stuff: like beer, onions, and some kind of slimey burger. But then I just fix them myself.

---

And I wanted to ask brandontoh if Taylor Swift put that semicolon in, or if he did.

Steve Martin was an innovator.

Food usually is better when you cook it yourself.

Brandon: I know the move I'm going to make but it will have to wait a it as I have to run some errands. Later

[cidermaid]

I made a New Year's resolution one year not to eat fast food all year long. It worked, and I make it every year.

You mentioned you hadn't eaten anything for a couple of days.
(Love the new name tag)

[brandontoh]

I made a New Year's resolution one year not to eat fast food all year long. It worked, and I make it every year.

Fast food is delicious, but they're so unhealthy. I only eat them once per month. How do you manage to keep away from the addicting flavour?

[rowens]

The tag name must come generic with the site.

How do I resist the flavour? I've noticed over the last several years that food doesn't taste as good as I imagined it did.

I didn't have any food for three weeks, except noodles and crackers, and I ran out of noodles early last week.

---

Nobody answerded my Taylor Swift question. I had a dream about her last night.

And I ordered some Chinese food. Maybe later I can read "The Beach" prose poem on here. And say something about it that has nothing to do with myself. Maybe.

[Todd]

That one e7 move was where I felt I slipped off the tracks. You've got this one, but we'll play it out and write the poems to the end. On your poem, I like the night got coloured into ballad. Here's my move and minute poem.


The Relationship's Dilemma

Re6

Oasis gives way to desert.
Our steps inert,
oppressive sun
water for one.

Two is a path of sand and bone,
but one alone
can still take flight,
betray by night.

Both will always take the water,
choose to slaughter.
Self interest
in each instance.