A woman's Love

[Erthona]

71,

Thanks for the feedback.

I was a counselor for 20+ years and you would be surprised how many of these abusive relationships were exactly like the fifties "When Men were Men, and Women were Women." Most of the abused women I encountered were very much dependent personality disorders. They would often stick with the guy until he killed them, on other occasions the woman would finally snap and kill the guy. Thus the line

"has broken me until I’m whole."

Actually the "creep" line should be "creak", thanks for catching the typo. I'll correct it.

Thanks again,

dale

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Tom,

"as mentioned re distant. also, what is your intent with the comma? It accentuates "my love" as a direct address. It fits with this line, but that double meaning muddles the stanza overall for me. "

Yes, there are some things I need to change to make it clearer.
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"with the direct address in the previous line should this be future tense? "I'll do the deed". No I think it is all in present tense, that was my idea anyway. It is happening as she speaks, she is killing him.

Thanks for the good comments, will take under advisement when I do the re-write,

Thanks much,

Dale