Marble Figurines

[RiverNotch]

On a stallion rearing,
a marble nun leans -- singing
St. Cecilia's hymns.

Marble Figurines

On a stallion rearing,
a humble nun leans, singing
St. Cecilia's hymns.

[Lizzie]

On a stallion rearing,
a humble nun leans, singing
St. Cecilia's hymns.

How does one lean on a rearing horse? I'm sure the figurine exists as recorded, but it's a strange image.

Its probably me, but I'm struggling to find any meaning in here. Then again, many say that a poem should not mean but just be, and touche.

[ellajam]

On a stallion rearing,
a humble nun leans, singing
St. Cecilia's hymns.

Hi, river, I like like the image and the mood. For me the size difference between the rearing stallion and the nun does the humbling. The title does some of the heavy lifting, with it you might consider

Against a rearing stallion
a nun leans — singing
St. Cecilia's hymns.

or without the title you could

A marble stallion rears,
a nun leans against him
singing St. Cecilia's hymns.

or something like that.

The rearing stallion made me think of St. George although I know little about him and a google of St. Cecilia's hymns was pleasant reading. I may be missing some bigger picture here but I still I'm enjoying the poem without any of that.

[nibbed]

On a stallion rearing,
a humble nun leans, singing
St. Cecilia's hymns.

Hi RiverNotch

I am typically not a fan of Catholicism or the art of sculpture,
but I am a fan of your poem! I don't think it needs improvement at all.
I see it as a poem indicating victory and deliverance.

Have a blessed day!

[RiverNotch]

thanks for the feedback! i would like to cut humble, yes -- i wrote this trying real hard to fulfill Japanese haiku rules, and still want to follow them to the best of my abilities -- and also the title, which gives things away a bit too much. so i went for a strange, to me hilarious, and to most of y'all probably doesn't work, compromise -- will get back when i think of something, or just stick with ella's first suggestion.

i'm not a fan of catholicism too, but the saints are not a strictly catholic thing -- they're not even all pre-reformation. i think martin luther talked about all the good folks in church going to heaven, and thus becoming saints? and certainly the bible mentions saints, just what exactly composes the bible? what exactly are saints? and why are there so few english bibles not translated by protestants?

[nibbed]

thanks for the feedback! i would like to cut humble, yes -- i wrote this trying real hard to fulfill Japanese haiku rules, and still want to follow them to the best of my abilities  -- and also the title, which gives things away a bit too much. so i went for a strange, to me hilarious, and to most of y'all probably doesn't work, compromise -- will get back when i think of something, or just stick with ella's first suggestion.

i'm not a fan of catholicism too, but the saints are not a strictly catholic thing -- they're not even all pre-reformation. i think martin luther talked about all the good folks in church going to heaven, and thus becoming saints? and certainly the bible mentions saints, just what exactly composes the bible? what exactly are saints? and why are there so few english bibles not translated by protestants?

Hi River, I don't know about who prints Bibles, but I am thankful for the King James Version of the Bible in English. I am not a Catholic, but I am not a protestant, either. I am just born-again. Likely tend to lean toward being Baptist. When I go to church it is a smaller assembly of people who believe the same way i do for the most part and the church is independent, that is, has no influence on how it is run from any outside convention. It's membership decides what and how the church will be run.

I am a saint and I haven't even reached heaven yet. It doesn't mean that I am perfect or will never do anything wrong, though. I have to ask God daily to help me and I fail so much. I'm always messin' up, but I want to do right and live how God wants and I try very hard to do so. Being a saint according to the Scripture means that you are born-again, that you have experienced the new birth, that is, you have trusted Christ alone and His finished work on the cross for eternal salvation, knowing He rose from the dead. The Holy Spirit confirms this in a believer's heart, speaking to our hearts directly and telling us we need Jesus. Jesus is our Good Shepherd, and our Gentle Savior. He loves us dearly, unlike any other, so much he took a cruel cross so we would have a way to heaven. Being born-again is an event in a persons life when they realize there is a real place called hell, and their sin has separated them from God. With a contrite heart they confess (only to God, one on one) they are a sinner and in need of a Savior who will forgive them and come into their heart to be Lord of their life. If they mean business from God, from that moment on they are saved from hell. It is at that point they become a saint.

Christ really has much to do with the New testament, but with the Old Testament, too! He took our sin upon Himself and saved us, just like the Passover Lamb of the Jews. There was a time back in the day when a child of god sinned he had to offer a lamb or other innocent animal to the Jewish High priest, for sacrifice, to pay for their sin. I know it sounds gross and yucky, but God required a blood sacrifice. Of course man didn't listen to God all the time as he should. So God sent His only Son, Christ, who was made sacrifice for all who would receive Him. He shed His Precious Blood for us all. When He died, the veil of the temple was torn in half. The temple was the place where sacrifice took place and the veil separated man from the Holy of Holies (the earthly place where God dwellt). So it was significant because the sacrifice of Christ was for all time and had now become a bridge from man to God Himself, no more separation because of all that Blood.

Christ is referred to as the Lamb of God because He took the sins of the whole world that day upon Himself on a cruel cross. He loves you very much. I hope that if you have never trusted in Christ (not a church, but Him, the person), that you will soon. I hope you will pray and tell Him all your heart.
Romans 10:9 That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. 10 For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. 11 For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed. 12 For there is no difference between the Jew and the Greek: for the same Lord over all is rich unto all that call upon him. 13 For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.

I understand about the haiku rules and wanting to follow them, too. Haiku and Limerick are my two favorite types of verse! I am forgetful enough I need a handbook to remember rules of poetry, though. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to share my faith, to share Scripture, and for the discussion of saints!

I agree about omitting the humble, too.
Have a very wonderful blessed day!

Janine

Please keep the focus on the poem. You are welcome to start a thread on religion education in General Discussion which members can participate in or avoid. ella/admin

[Lizzie]

Saints and iconography are more part of the Eastern Orthodox tradition than the Western.

Billy says not to worry too much about the syllable count, so I say do what you like with the language.

[Leanne]

On a stallion rearing,
a marble nun leans -- singing
St. Cecilia's hymns.

St Cecilia is quite special to me, not so much for her dubious martyrdom (or indeed existence) but because she's the subject of one of my favourite poems, Dryden's gorgeous metaphysical song. Also, one of my very best friends took Cecilia as her Confirmation name, so I learned all about her very early in life.

What I like best about this poem is the interplay between the staunch virgin and the highly sexualised stallion. To defeat it, she must resist utterly, with her faith as her shield -- and it would never occur to the stallion that instead of rearing aggressively, he could have approached gently and with patience. I think the use of "marble" within the poem brings several different aspects -- white, pure, cold, even Galatea perhaps. You might consider losing "marble" from your title now.

On a side note, as a Catholic I find the proselytising in certain posts quite offensive. As a poet, I find them inappropriate. I come to sites like this to discuss poems, not to hear Sunday School bullshit.