Love Poem

[homesick_subterranean]

Waves lapping against shore;
My lips against yours.

[busker]

The image of moving waves is at odds with that of a static kiss
I get the allusion to the ocean reaching its intended destination etc but the metaphor doesn’t work
Also, the image itself isn’t sufficiently arresting

[carahmellow]

Waves lapping against shore;
My lips against yours.

I try my absolute hardest to stray from waves/tide metaphors and Sun/Bright metaphors among others.... as i find they are super cliche, and easy. Am I always successful in this? no... but they do come across as slightly cliche sometimes.

[rowens]

Waves lapping against shore;
My lips and yours.

And the title of the poem: Love Poem